Tooth Fairy Ideas and Where You Can Shove Them

I am now in the stage of parenting where I am learning all about the tooth fairy.  To be honest, she seems like a Pinterest “everyday is magical” wench.  Yup I just said that.  My 5-year-old has his first loose tooth and things went from “maybe the Tooth Fairy will bring me a quarter” to “what is the Tooth Fairy getting me for my first tooth?  A trampoline?”  WTF.  Since when are teeth that big of a deal?  My son asked me what I got for my first tooth to which I replied, “Well, it was 1987, so probably nothing.  Maybe a quarter, but most likely it was a nickel.”  Like seriously.

Remember the 80’s and how our parents were WAY less into parenting?  It was awesome.  But I’m a mom in 2017, and all of a sudden I have to have elaborate celebrations for everything and now I find out that “the first tooth” is actually something I have to celebrate.  Come the hell on, you guys.  Which one of you upped the anty on making a big deal out of EVERYTHING??  First I had to have 24 days of Christmas delight with that stupid elf, and now I have to invite the Queen for supper because my kid lost a tooth.      Continue reading “Tooth Fairy Ideas and Where You Can Shove Them”